A new cheesy pregame

****Cycle correction****

In case you haven't figured it out from my cryptic but not-too-subtle hints, Christine and I celebrated our anniversary this week with a little getaway to the Azalea Inn, a bed and breakfast in Savannah, Ga.

We should be home any minute, if we haven't arrived already. Hopefully we have, because it was a grueling 13-hour slog on the way down. (But we left before dawn last week and were fueled by five hours of sleep. We are more rested for today's return trip.)

On the way down, we would just hit scan on the car radio until we found a suitable station. On one, we heard a guy who sounded like Pierre Robert. Because of that we stopped and hoped it wasn't another one of the many country or religious stations that come in around the South.

It wasn't. It was Braves pregame. And, as much as it pains me to admit it, the guy who did the pregame interview with Bobby Cox is just as bad as Chris Wheeler. (But I still hate Chris Wheeler.)

In this guy's first question, he asked Bobby about the day before - when the Braves won a blowout after retiring Greg Maddux's number - managing to get in there how it was the perfect day for the team, the fans and the announcers.

Yeah, way to be hard-hitting there. He made Wheels sound like Howard Cosell.

Speaking of announcers' favorite days, Christine was upset when she saw we missed Jimmy Rollins' cycle on Sunday. I wasn't. I bet Wheels - whose life goal is to see a "natural cycle" - will still be blathering on about it when we tune in for tomorrow's game.

J-Roll didn't hit a natural cycle. For those who don't know, it's a term we've only heard used by Wheels to describe a cycle in which all the hits go in progression (single, double, triple and home run, in that order).

Red Sox updates: They're going to retire No. 14 for Hall of Famer Big Jim Ed Rice, and Julio Lugo was shipped to the Cardinals for Chris Duncan.

Lugo to go

The perplexing marriage between Julio Lugo and the Red Sox is ending.

No one quite understood why the Red Sox signed him as a free agent in 2006, and no one was surprised it didn't work out.

Lugo wanted it to work out, but doesn't blame the team for jettisoning him:

When you see a good looking girl, you get married and sometimes things don't work out. I gave it my best and unfortunately things didn't work out. This is the best for both parties. I wanted it to work out but it didn't.

I heard on the radio that the Mets are one of three teams interested him. That would be funny - the Mets, who have Jose Reyes, having to field former Sox Alex Cora then Lugo.

Theo Epstein took the blame for the foolish four-year, $36 million contract he wasted on Lugo:

This was one of the free agent signings that doesn't work out. We were paying for past performance, not current performance. That's the true definition of a mistake, and as the decision, that's on me. We'll just move on and be a better organization having gone through it, and we'll make better decisions going forward.

The first game of the post-Julio Lugo era got off to a good start: The Red Sox lead the Blue Jays 2-0 in the 1st inning. Clay Buchholz retired the first three batters.

The Phillies game could be ugly - they're up 2-1 over the Marlins in the 2nd. All runs are on home runs so far.

Two Brads didn't get the message

When I fell asleep, I thought the Phillies had the game in hand. So did Todd Zolecki, whose postgame post allowed early-risers like me to relive the roller coaster ending for Brad Lidge and the Phillies:

Sometimes I get the feeling something is going to go terribly wrong in a baseball game, and I get ready to rewrite my game story. I got that feeling when Steve Bartman interfered with Moises Alou in left field in the NLCS in 2003.

But last night was not one of those games.

Even after Brad Lidge put a couple runners on base with two outs in the bottom of the ninth inning at Dodger Stadium, I still felt like Lidge was going to get out of the inning and preserve the Phillies' 3-2 victory.

I'll spare you the drama. Lidge didn't come through. Zolecki, however, pins blame on Pedro Feliz, who botched a ground ball with two outs in the 9th. "I just missed it," Feliz said. "I've got nothing more to say." Dodgers 4, Phillies 3.

Red Sox: There was no miracle comeback last night. Julio Lugo continues to draw ire from the fans and media. I don't see the games so I can't weight in. I do believe we need to upgrade defense at shortstop (isn't that what sealed the deal in 2004?) and remove Brad Penny from the team. He was outpitched by Kevin Millwood last night:

Penny pitched under odd circumstances. Roughly 90 minutes before the game, he sat on a clubhouse couch and watched a college game on ESPN. Every couple of minutes along the bottom of the screen, Penny could read about how the Atlanta Braves are reportedly discussing a trade for him with the Red Sox.
...
"That's been my whole career," Penny said. "I don't look at that at all, really."

While Penny couldn't last through the sixth, Millwood dominated. The Red Sox managed six hits in the first seven innings. Millwood struck out five, and his final victim was Lugo.

So despite the fact that both Brads were hurt by their defense, I still say they should have read the memo that this was supposed to be the week of good pitching news at SoxandPhils.

Maybe J-Moy doesn't trust the young'ins: I just like this note in David Murphy's story:

Chris Coste was behind the plate last night for the third time in Jamie Moyer's last four starts. Moyer entered the night 4-1 with a 3.90 ERA in five starts with Coste at catcher, compared to 0-4 with a 10.52 ERA in five starts with starter Carlos Ruiz.

Hallelujah!

Neither the cold 18-degree air during my morning walk nor my nice hot cup of coffee jolted me awake today as much as the exaltation I felt when I read the stories about Ruben Amaro Jr.'s weekend press conference.

One of the few questions for the defending champions is who will fill the No. 5 slot in the rotation. There's been no movement toward a particular candidate, but the new GM made it clear who won't get the job. (Hint: His name rhymes with beaten).

"It's a four-man competition, and he's not involved in that," Ruben Amaro Jr. said a few minutes ago at Citizens Bank Park. "Is it possible that Eaton pitches well enough to put himself in the mix? You never know what's going to happen. Right now, we just think those other four guys [Chan Ho Park, J.A. Happ, Kyle Kendrick and Carlos Carrasco] give us a better opportunity to win."

Yes! Yes! Yes! It's nice to hear an honest negative assessment from a club about one of its biggest mistakes ever. Fortunately, like the Eric Gagne-Red Sox debacle, Adam Eaton didn't prevent the team from winning a championship.

More good news: Sports tell-alls are usually sugar-coated or slanted toward the writer's personal bias. I might give Joe Torre's the benefit of the doubt, if for nothing else than to see his account of why the Yankees underachieved during the later part of his tenure. A-Fraud, indeed.

Oops: Last week, I made a steroid reference to Julio Lugo gaining 20-pounds of muscle. This week, Nick Cafardo corrected himself:

I meant Julio Lugo had gained 10 pounds of muscle, not the 20 I incorrectly typed last week.

Go Phils!

Unexpectedly, the Phillies and Cole Hamels stole a little bit of the sports page from the Eagles' big game today by agreeing to a three-year $20.5 million contract. The deal seems about right for each side. The real benefit is avoiding what could have been an ugly arbitration process, although Hamels will be eligible for one year of arbitration after this contract expires.

All in all, it's real good news for the Phillies, who still have unresolved contract situations with several players, including Ryan Howard, Jayson Werth, Ryan Madson and Shane Victorino. Scott Lauber has a good recap of the Phillies' finances after the Cole Hamels deal. He thinks the defending champions will carry a payroll of $125 million - which could be $5 million more than the Red Sox. I think it was just yesterday that Christine said the Sox were as bad as the Yankees with payroll. {You're forgetting that you still haven't paid Jonathan Papelbon.}

Nick Cafardo: Another good Sunday read in the Globe with the rhetorical question of why certain teams (SoxandPhils) excel in the postseason while others (MetsandYanks) don't. He also thinks the Phillies want to get Ben Sheets (but he also had them in on Derek Lowe) and that Julio Lugo put on 20 pounds of muscle. I hope he didn't use J.C. Romero's frequent buyer card at the Vitamin Shoppe.

Football: I'm going with the Eagles and Steelers today. I don't want the Eagles to win, although the Phillies are rooting for them. Be careful what you wish for.

Elvis has left the building

The Phillies have found their man to play left field as they try to repeat as World Champions in 2009. No word yet whether he's got a bull dog to completely replace Pat Burrell and Elvis in Philadelphia.

I'm sure Raul Ibanez is a capable replacement and that he's as underrated as everyone says he is. But is it really better to sign a 36-year-old, who is really just a glorified Jeff Conine or Kevin Millar, to a three-year $30 million contract as opposed to whatever Pat Burrell is going to wind up with?

I completely agree with jettisoning aging stars to avoid stagnating a championship team (see: Martinez, Pedro; Damon, Johnny). But what's the point if you're just going to get older and probably just as expensive?

I know I should give the benefit of the doubt to the brain trust that's coming off a World Championship, and that Pat Burrell has his flaws, but I don't like this. And I'm not going to like watching the Phillies clinch their third straight division title without Elvis on the field.

In her online chat today, Amalie Benjamin put the kibosh on the once-rumored Julio Lugo for Eric Byrnes deal. So it looks like neither of our teams will have a bull dog.

This just in: It looks like the Yankees bought another one - A.J. Burnett. Won't they ever learn?

[Photo credit: Jose F. Moreno, Courier-Post - it's an old photo so I can't say for sure he still works there]

How annoying

Don't break Ryan Madson's remote (it's his favorite gadget), mispronounce Chris Coste's name or watch a horror movie if So Taguchi is in the room. And whatever you do, if there's a baby hurting, don't show him to Pedro Feliz.

Next up in our review of the Phillies yearbook answers is "Nothing annoys me more than ..."

Topping the list, seven Phils had peeves related to driving, such as traffic by Brett Myers and taxi cabs by Shane Victorino. The team also doesn't like to be woken up (would that explain June?): Five of them are irked by being roused - mostly by a ringing phone, but Kris Benson was most specific, saying he hates it when his dogs wake him by barking at the pool guy or UPS lady. Five others listed rude eating habits.

Chase Utley said "people who stink." We don't know if that's a knock on some of his inferior teammates such as Adam Eaton or whether he's telling Pat Burrell to take a shower. Utley's very mysterious in some ways.

Other noteworthy answers: a messy locker (Erik Bruntlett), stupid people (Clay Condrey), complaining (Chad Durbin), hatred (Tom Gordon), sympathy (Brad Lidge), loud people (Jimmy Rollins), rain delays (Rudy Seanez) and overall dumbness (Jayson Werth).

Burrell and Ryan Howard didn't have answers.

What annoys me: Adam Eaton. Especially when he gives up eight runs in 3.2 innings and loses 10-4 to the Diamondbacks before a national audience. That's two consecutive clunkers for Eaton. Why was J.A. Happ was demoted again? Oh yeah, Eaton still has a year and a half left on that bargain $24 million contract.

The Mets won and are now a half game back. The Marlins are winning and could join them. As Christine noted, we'll be scoreboard watching tomorrow to see if the Phillies can hold onto their narrow division lead heading into the All-Star break.

What doesn't annoy me: Scoring runs for Tim Wakefield. The Red Sox backed the knuckler to a 12-1 win over the Orioles. All starters had a hit except for Jed Lowrie, who is back up to replace the injured Julio Lugo, who is going to miss four to six weeks. Kevin Youkilis hit a grand slam.

The win, and a Rays loss, puts us a half game back heading into the final day of the pre-All-Star portion of the schedule.

I want Renteria back

I left work later than usual because of some extracurricular activity. When I got in the car, I was disappointed to hear that the Red Sox long stretch of good quality pitching (Daisuke Matsuzaka's wildness excluded) was ended by young Clay Buchholz, and the Sox were trailing the Tigers 5-2.

As I drove home, I heard them pull within one, and I got that unbeatable feeling again. But then, Julian Taverez, making his first appearance since April 24, got tagged for three runs. After getting home, I didn't check the score again until I went online and was surprised to see the Sox were up 9-8 in the ninth. I figured I'd wait out the inning before posting another toast to their resiliency.

But Jonathan Papelbon - fueled largely by Julio Lugo's 10th error of the year - blew the save. Funny, in the car I heard former Sox Edgar Renteria - known affectionately to Boston fans as Rent-A-Wreck for his awful 2005 season - make a great diving play to rob a near-certain hit.

Oh well, time to start a new five-game winning streak.

Late Phillies: They trail the Arizona Diamondbacks 3-1 in the sixth. Good night. Not really.